Hatfield, Herts, England, UK, Earth (Real)

Some Of Us Have To Live Here

Author: Stephen Patterson
Date: 1996/05/21
Agree? Disagree? : Have Your Say
Buy Books About This Topic At: Amazon UK Amazon US
Send This Article To A Friend: Email It Use Telepathy

How do I find Hatfield?

Hatfield can be easily located, especially if you are hitching to it from elsewhere in England. The first stage in locating Hatfield is to locate either London, the A1 or the A1(M) [1], whichever is nearest.

From London

1) Catch a train from Kings Cross, and get off it at Hatfield station.
2) Travel around the M25 (either way, it doesn't really matter).  Leave on
   the A1(M) at South Mimms, and turn off the A1(M) at junction 3
   (simple really).
3) Catch the 797 bus from Victoria coach station (don't try this on Sundays)

From the rest of the world

Go to England, head for London, and follow the above directions.

Where to stay in Hatfield

Scarborough, North Yorkshire, England, UK

Yes, I know it's several hundred miles away, but having lived there for 10 years, I can vouch for it being superior in most respects to Hatfield.

Comet Hotel, Comet Way, Hatfield

If you can afford a hotel, why not leave some of that excess money dragging down your (insert appropriate item of clothing here) in the nearest Students Union (SU) bar (you will already have seen the University of Hertfordshire whilst turning off the A1(M)), where it will lead a much more enjoyable (albeit brief) life.

NOTE: It is not the author's intention to slag off the above hotel, so could
      you please direct all lawsuits towards other persons (e-mail me for a
      list).

What to do in Hatfield

1) Leave (as if you hadn't already guessed.)
2) ...<author thinks>.... St. Albans is nice this time of year, and it is
   only 5 miles away.

What is in Hatfield?

Shops (strange enough)

First, there is the Galleria shopping centre, positioned directly above the A1(M), and hence a source of major traffic snarlups until some enterprising engineer tunneled underneath it. In the Galleria, you will find many shops designed purely for looking around, but apart from these, the adventurous shopper may find:

1. Tk Maxx, a quality discount clothing shop;
2. Our Price, a record shop which sells no records, and is far too mainstream for any serious music lover.
3. Also several bars/cafes (as yet untried by this bold sage), and the 9 screen UCI cinema.

If you are however intending to buy anything, don't panic, Hatfield town centre is only a few hundred yards away, just head for the nearest tower block, and is full of shops selling practical goods for the real shopper.

Hatfield Aerodrome

Currently used by British Aerospace and the University Of Hertfordshire. Formerly home to De Havilland Aircraft, and under consideration as an incinerator site (really), just up the road from the Galleria.

The University Of Hertfordshire (UH) -- Hatfield campus

The Hatfield campus of UH is one of the two Hatfield campuses (shouldn't that be campi?), the other one being the School of Art & Design at Hatfield Aerodrome. The Hatfield campus is home (amongst other things) to the School of Mechanical/Aeronautical Engineering, the School of Physioterrorism, and the School of Advanced Beer Studies (known to non initiates as the Font and Elephant House SU bars.)

Tourism

Hatfield House, Old Hatfield (the bit near the station). No data available to the author at present, however, it is well worth a visit as it is positioned on one of the very few hills in Hatfield (a rarity indeed, as even East Anglia has more hills.)

Pubs, clubs, etc.

THE HARRIER, South Hatfield (next to the odd church).
I mention this only to advise all who follow to avoid it -- I've had better nights out watching paint dry.

THE CAVENDISH ARMS, Bishops rise (do they indeed, nudge, wink, say n'more.)
Can get cramped at times, but well worth a visit.
Short beers list: Strongbow
                  Guinness
                  Moscow Mule
                  K's cider
                  and others.

THE FORUM club, Lemsford Rd, near the town centre (opposite ASDA car park). The Forum does theme nights with a different theme each night of the week, so make sure you visit it on the right night.

THE FONT. You need a valid SU card, or a friend with one, as this bar is part of UH, and home of cheap beers. Here is a (very) short list:

          Murphy's, 1.55 pounds/pint
          Guinness, 1.70 pounds/pint
          Gladstone, 1.30 pounds/pint a local bitter, brewed in nearby
          Newcastle Brown, 1.60 pounds/bottle                      \Hertford
          Vodka & Coke, 1 pound each

THE ELEPHANT HOUSE (Ele House), also part of UH.
Beers similarly priced, but a low selection.
The Ele is a good place to have a quiet drink in the company of close friends, or to have a game of pool, but otherwise cannot compete with the Font (unless your idea of a good night out is to forget it through sheer boredom, rather than through the use of alcohol and other guilt enhancing/reducing drugs.)

Food

Avoid the local Fish & Chip shops, unless your digestion is unaffected by the quality of your food (lucky you). Having said this, Appleby's in the town centre is the best of a bad bunch.

If a sandwich is your idea of a good lunch, I can recommend from experience that you visit the bakers opposite Motor World in the town centre, where you can purchase a mean sandwich (they even build them with your preferred filling).

When (not) to visit Hatfield

Avoid:    1) Last 2 weeks in September

2. Last 2 weeks in December
3. First week or 2 in January
4. Last week in March
5. Last week in April

These are the approximate dates of major student migrations between UH and home, and are probably similar for all university towns. Apart from these dates, the rest of the year is fairly safe.

Conclusion

Mostly full of southerners, nutters, or any combination of both.

[1]	Due to a slight quirk in the road numbering system, the A1(M) is the same as the A1

See also

• Alcohol Guilt In Students
• Hemel Hempstead, Hertfordshire, England, UK, Earth
• London, England, UK, Earth
• Pubs, How To Deal With Them