Chaos Theory, Origins Of

The average person believes that chaos theory proves that the universe is inherently confounding, and that they should blame mindless butterflies for their ruined roofing.� For once, "they" are completely accurate.� To truly understand chaos, one must first be familiar with the discovery of the theory.

A young and bored research student in New York (Rudiger P. Jones) decided that studying weather in a place that was perennially unpleasant was not the way to become a happy person.� It was at this moment that he named the first concept of chaos, "Strange Attractors".� It appeared that after 3 years of miserable snow and humidity, the Caribbean Islands were highly "attractive".

Taking all his research grants, and none of his research equipment, he left for the islands.� Upon arriving Rudiger attended Yolanda White's Famous Toga Party.� Within the course of the night he had (unsurprisingly) spent all of the money.

Rudiger realized that he was in need of a brilliant theory (read:� excuse). Yolanda, recognizing true genius in action, provided Rudiger with falsified documents that told of a horrible storm suddenly appearing that destroyed Rudigers "lab".� Meanwhile he wrote a thesis on how a butterfly flapping its wings in New York can cause "unexpected lab-eating storms".�

Needless to say, the company that issued the grant immediately called for Mr. Jones arrest.� Surprisingly, however, the scientific community rallied behind Rudiger.

It was heralded the re-unification of the sciences.� Breydan Asdef of the Greenibreian Institute of Advanced Astrophysics says, "Finally, something we can all blame our failures on!� What's more, Chaos Theory thrives on that failure.� I never complain that the Biology department gets all the grants any more.� I just say that a butterfly ruined my experiment, and they give me more money!� It explains more than the X-files!"

Rudiger was never convicted, and today continues his study of the effect of the Margarita on the Toga Party.

See also

• Chaos Theory, Definition Of
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• Weather, Influencing The
  /articles/9R17.html
• X-Files, 20 Things You Need To Know About The
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