* Id:  Greece
* Revision:  2
* State:  unapproved
*
* Log:
* Revision 1  1998/10/10  Dan Shlepakov <d_m_sh@ibm.net>
* Initial submitted version.
*
* Checked-out  1999/05/01  Alex McLintock <alex@arcfan.demon.co.uk>
*
* Checked-in with
* Revision 2  1999/05/10  Alex McLintock <alex@arcfan.demon.co.uk>
* Edited but author hasn't responded yet.  Actually edited by Robert Uhl.
*
* Checked-out  1999/08/12  Mark Seaborn <mseaborn@bigfoot.com>

%t Greek Cruises
* edited by Robet Uhl, Thanks Robert
%s Why They Can Be Holidays From Hell
%a Dan Shlepakov  (d_m_sh@ibm.net)
%n 6R awaiting author confirmation
%i Mediterranean Cruises
%i Cruises, Greek
%e
Greece is a wonderful land.  It really is.  All exotic and hot and different
from other places.  Maybe this is one of the reasons that many people
decide to take a cruise in the Mediterranian sea and see 'The Wonders of
Greece' from the board of a giant ship.  Well, here is fair advice: DON'T.

After you get on the ship, and all your happy relatives on the shore wave 
goodbye to you, you finally realize that you are trapped.  After dealing with 
the baggage (10 minutes), examine your room, ( or cell, as you will think of 
it). This will take all of five minutes.  You can then take a stroll and 
examine the ship itself (1 more hour).  And if you have a partner, you can 
even do some "blood cleaning" (2 hours), you realize that you have another 5 
and a half days to go crazy.

Seeing the islands of Greece is supposed to be the good part of the cruise, 
but it turns out to be a "hit and run" mission.  After you reach one of
the islands, the guide gives you half an hour to see the place, which is
not even enough to find a decent site for picture taking.  After two or
three such "visits", you start to experience this unpleasant feeling down
your stomach, and you realize that the only experience you will remember
after this cruise will be a grinning Greek salesman offering you a bowl of
peanuts that costs more then a ticket to Japan.

But at least you will do something in those "happy" half hours that you will
have here and there.  Because life on board sometimes will lower you to the
mental state of a dead starfish.  

The other people on board make it even worse.

The Americans are to be avoided (no harm meant; there are some who are really
annoying).  If a middle-aged bald fat male decides to join you on your
strolls, meals, and God save, sometimes even the pool, your vacation is dead
for sure.  In the first 5 minutes of conversation you will get a full 
description of his sexual life, his dreams and his health problems.  He may 
be as intelligent as you could wish, but after some 20 minutes of his company 
you will feel really sorry you are not on "Titanic" in its last few moments.  
If we are talking about meals, the experience of 20 fat bald males with their 
ever more "enjoyable" wives jumping out of the pool, stopping any conversation 
thay had when the "dinner is served" gong is heard can really make you regret 
the day you were born.

Wonderful land, Greece, truly wonderful.  Just be careful with the cruise,
REALLY careful...
%e
*EOA*